The problem with my memory is that I remember too much for my own good. It's not selective and it's not forgiving. So, when someone does something to hurt me, I remember it. It could have been 10 years ago, 5 years ago or 1 year ago or whatever. I think this is part of the reason why I have a hard time letting go when an event or an action disrupts the intended "great-life".
In this case, one little bitty thing has triggered a herd of painful memories and emotions. I can't put my mind on something else, and it has completely consumed my thought process; hence why I am writing about it here (however vague I am being).
I also don't feel like bringing it up to anyone would do anything. It would just seem like I can't let go, which I guess is the hard truth. I just wish that I could make myself forget some things and never let that memory be triggered again. I wish they didn't ruin my day, even if don't show it.
:o(
maybe you should do some sort of cleansing ritual... i've always wondered if they work - it never hurts to try!
ReplyDeleteSo do you want me to be the funny big "sissy" or the caring one???? Funny one will ask you what was the song that you used to sing and dance to with me on top of the coffee table when you were 3 smarty pants. Caring one would say "It sounds like you had a rough day with an old "friend", let's be positive and move forward... movie and salsa?" Anywho, just remember ALL the things you do have stored away (good and bad) get you to where you are right now. What is that diaper commercial...Live, Laugh Grow??? xoxoxox More
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